Journey's for days: May 2014

Alicia, you have no idea how much I appreciate you. Let’s just start off with that. You will NEVER grasp how much! No matter how many times I squeeze the crap out of you (slash give a hug to you) or how many times I tell you I love you on our nightly ‘How’d you survive today?” phone calls, you can’t get it. Just know I will always be your friend.

Now, a disclaimer – I may not be the best writer in the world. I’m no Huff Post! We’re going to go on detours and there will be lots of anyways-ing! But this an emotional topic after all…and I am not very skilled at letting my emotions flow eloquently from brain to mouth so I hope this isn’t weird for you to read. Peace Corps relationships are just SO DIFFERENT than one we’d make in the states. We are put in a country for 2 long, arduous years with people we normally wouldn’t hang out with so finding a true friend was a big deal for me. Also, you just inspire me Alicia. You know I love you but sometimes it’s nice to hear it too. Plus, I want all my friends around the world to know about you and meet you one day in California or Colorado because it’s my favorite thing when my friends know each other and get along! All I want is to assure that you hear EVERYTHING I have to say about how great you are; I don’t want to miss out on one single detail.

In our lives, we meet very few people we can’t live without. The universe God’s say, “You know what Omnipotent Bobsilius? Alicia and Gia are both in Peru right now and they would be SUCH GREAT FRIENDS! Should we help them take care of each other??” And then, ZAP! We can’t control what happens next, but all of a sudden, we’re in the same room, we’re introduced and our lives are better for it. We’re laughing more, we feel more confident, and love is mutually shared. I laugh so hard with you Alicia. Laughter happens to be the shortest distance between two people, ya know? The journey together began with a good joke. Most likely, being the disgusting Peace Corps volunteers we are, it was about our doomed bowel movements.

Friendship is like magic because we don’t know the EXACT moment in time we got close enough to say the weird things we say to each other without rejecting the other person like a moldy block of cheese, but we gave each other one feeling of happiness. A feeling that floated off into our brain’s white matter, red light blinking with urgency, to signal us to keep this person around. “Get person’s phone number!!!” Alicia, we’ve maintained this happiness we bring each other through our insane, asinine, boring, extraordinary Peace Corps experiences – phone calls we’re both crying from laughter about the other person’s day or hearing the wrong words (“Did you just call me a baby dick?!”). You help me talk until I fall asleep too because there’s always so much on my damn mind. You’re an insomnia remedy. We got to share the jungle together (I would have NEVER touched that anaconda if you weren’t there). You’re a first-time catalyst. I got to visit your Peace Corps site and we ATTEMPTED to watch the sunset like lovers but that failed…but it was okay, because we were together. You’re a guilty pleasured cliché. Mancora party nights dancing our butt’s off on the sand, letting me sing oldies to you as the sun goes down, sleeping in that Huanchaco beach apartment shithole but, again, it was okay because it was OUR shithole. I’d get into ANY mess with you girl, ‘cause I know we’d be laughing on our way out. And what about eating our beloved pizza? Our love for pizza is incomparable…so much so that no one ever believes us when we order the biggest size. You’re like a RUSTIC ROCKING CHAIR in a Southern home that stays comfortable for generations. Everyone wants to grow old with you. (I hope you didn’t take that seriously, I’m cracking up writing this.) Even when there isn’t loud music, a dance floor or anything to talk about, we can just BE with each other. I like riding the bus or cab with you or walking around town to do a frivolous errand. You’re the simple things.

This is my favorite thing about you – you love like a child which is why you don’t think it’s weird how affectionate I am. You let me hold you and squeeze the crap out of you and give you kisses and hold your hand for the hell of it. You let people think we’re lesbians (even though Lord knows we are too straight for our own good, ha!). We are innocent and pure together. Heart open, heart strong.

My most important goal in life is to SHARE MY EXPERIENCES with GOOD PEOPLE, and you, my friend, are one of my favorite people in the world to share this world with. You bring the best out in me so each experience is just the way I’d like it to be. You already know that family and friends are everything to me. I’m a happy-go-lucky people person. I love getting to know people, but I normally don’t get as close to anyone as I have with you. That’s why it’s such a big deal to me that you’re in my life Alicia! I may not have many close friends because I’m a hard ass on people at the same time. So much bullshit out there clouding people’s minds. A good, solid, MORAL person that has no hidden agenda, that is purely themselves, INNOCENT, smart and has their priorities straight, and that DOESN’T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT WHAT ANYONE THINKS ABOUT THEM is so hard to find. I also want my friends to be my role models, because I firmly believe YOU ARE WHO YOUR FRIENDS ARE, and I can honestly say I look up to you Alicia. You motivate me to be a better person. You’ve helped me become more trusting, analytical, directed, less judgmental, better at sharing, ha! Now I don’t think twice about giving you the last fry. Last but not least, you’ve given me the type of memories a person can’t help but smile about. There are some things going to the grave with us but there are other stories we’ll never shut up about to our children. I can’t wait for those days.

You just know me so damn well – a loud, spontaneous spirit, borderline crazy - I'll give ya that - a personality that is so strong, obstanate and FIXED, I know I can be hard to get along with – and you STILL call me the next day to see how I’m doing. You don’t think I’m annoying…well maybe sometimes you want to slap me, and tell me to shut up or FOCUS, ha! In a sense though, that’s my favorite part about our friendship – the honesty. We can be 100% honest and not kill each other at the end of the day. In my opinion, the best friendships are the kind we have - the honest, healthy fighting, unconditional love kind.

Friend, you have accomplished wonderful things here in Peru. Congratulations. You will be missed a great deal. I get home shortly after you but we know how life goes out here. Once you’re gone, I’ll talk to you an exponentially less amount, ghost dialing your number that doesn’t work anymore just for fun. That’s no one’s fault. It’s the friggin’ Peace Corps – I have less access to Internet and barely have cell service some days, so it just is what it is. I’m not trying to be too dramatic, but we are writing the last pages of our Peace Corps Peru chapter. Attention must be paid. Our pen picks up again in the states, but we will reread what has taken place here forever. We’ve lived a lifetime in 2 years. Intense stuff, right baby dick?! :-)

I know you said you did Peace Corps to prove to yourself that you could because this isn’t normally the type of challenge you thought you could handle, but I wish you saw yourself the way I do. I knew you were going to finish strong all along Alicia. You’re an adventurer with a heart of GOLD and you’re stronger than you think, so next time you think you’re “shy” and not fit for the task at hand, think of the way I see you. An Alicia with conviction and a force to be reckoned with, a LEADER! When you get back home and the transition from developing to first world is awkward, I’m there in spirit listening and hugging you. You’re probably going to get overwhelmed by beauty/materialism/comfort/missing Peru like crazy but I know you’ll see it through and calm yourself down, because Peace Corps also gave us the tool to self-soothe and use our perspective for the better. Peace Corps made us get life on a whole new level, which is why we are fearless lovers of the world. We venture where other don’t think they can. Venturing with you Alicia has been INCREDIBLE. The unknown is now our friend. Allow me to quote one of my favorite movies, The Lion King, we “laugh in the face of danger,” because we know life is too short anyways. The root of all these life lessons is love though. From the love we’ve given each other, we’ve been able to become hybrid forms of ourselves. Thank you for your love mama! You’re a friend anyone would be lucky to have when the going gets tough, but good thing the going isn’t over yet. Of course we won’t live forever but our memory will, if we live this life right. Let’s keep living right Alicia. TO YOUR LIFE, ALICIA, the “going” that makes my “going” worth the walk! I love you!